Tim was one of the St Albans Dads we used to hang around with.

We got to know Tim as most of us did, firstly through our wives and partners who would congregate outside the school gates dropping their kids off and collecting them at the end of the day. Claire would drop off Bella and Joe at Aboyne Lodge and this is where friendships were made amongst the kids and mums outside the school gates. The Dads, slowly got round to developing their own friendships with each other, introducing along the way other non Aboyne Lodge dads into the fold.

The Dads were a social bunch with pub sessions, Christmas meals, yearly dad and kids camping trips, canoe and canal trips to name a few. Tim was very much part of our group of dads and was always one of the first to sign up for the events. He was never the loudest, groups can only take so many of this kind but was excellent company. He was a great listener, calm, wise with his words and always willing to help. I guess these skills were established through his teaching and his commitment to nurturing and development of his students.

Our yearly camping trips to Emberton Country Park with the children consisted of three days of fun and games, very little washing or fresh fruit. Tim would bring Joe along, camping was not for Bella and in the early years Tim would turn up in his yellow or was it orange VW Combi Van, open the door, put up the awning, open up the bedroom on the roof and hey, he was done in ten minutes. The rest of us, one hour later would still be getting our tents up and organising our gear. There was a certain amount of Tim’s van envy coming from us, as we cursed another tent peg hitting a rock. Saying that, once Tim was done setting up, he would always lend a hand once he was sure Joe was occupied. Sometimes fishing rod in hand, the two would head out to see what they could catch in the lake. Cannot remember much success as memories fade, but I do remember Joe was always looked after first. Dads do that! Food on camp was a messy business in the early days, but as a group we became a well-oiled unit and as the years went on each of us had our own role during meal times. Tim became the master of all things Egg! The Master Scrambler!!

With the children growing up and going their own ways, camping finished, but The Dads kept their friendships going with other trips and social gatherings. Many fond memories. As mentioned Tim was not loud but you don’t really need loud when talking whilst standing at the stern of a canal boat, beer in hand with Tim steering, tiller in one hand and beer in the other. Or whiling the time away chatting with Tim, as pairs of Dads paddled / floated down the River Wye. Or putting the world to right or at least attempting to, within the confines of our dear pubs. Wisdom, the spirit of generosity, great anecdotes and a gentle manner is what Tim would give to the group. Great times, great memories and to think Tim will no longer be around is truly very sad.

For a few of us Tim was also a Rugby Dad and colleague to those at OA’s for many years, always on the search for the elusive veggie burger and always the one able to take the kids to the away games when we could not make it, always prepared to help out. That’s what mates do.

In the last few months after his cancer diagnosis the strength of our friend was immense. So many would crumble with what Tim had to go through but Tim was accepting of his condition, stoical, gracious, never angry and got on with life until the end without complaining and demanding attention to his hardships. Walks in Heartwood Forest with Tim could have felt like a funeral march but Tim was having none of this downbeat attitude. That seemed to be the last thing on his mind in these moments. It amazes us that he was still in touch with his students until a couple of weeks before his death. My word, we could all do with a bit of Tim’s brave spirit .

Tim was a great friend to us Dads but we must not forget his pride and joy was Joe and Bella, not us Dads. From our time spent with Tim he would discuss his kids, achievements and worries when they arose. We saw first hand on our camping trips how Tim and Joe’s relationship was one of love and caring and this went full circle with Joe looking after his Dad in the end.
The St Albans Dads liked that !